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Life in the new normal

Wow…it’s been a week or so since life just got crazy.

At the start, I was optimistic and well, I still am, but something has come over me today…and I just don’t feel like being strong even though I know I will have to be. For the moment though…I just want to curl up in a ball and cry.

Instead I’m writing this blog…because I think it’s important to write it out, and it’s important to talk about.

It was my bad, I woke up at 5 am and made the mistake of looking at Facebook, and down the rabbit hole I went. News stories, blogs from a friend in Italy, statistics…

And finally a post with some lovely old people in a nursing home in England, with signs on a white board saying it was gonna be ok, that we’ll get through this, to hold each other tight and know we’ll be fine…even now, it just makes me cry. It makes me realize I’ve been strong for a lot of people, but I forgot to process the absolute fear and panic that wells up inside of me each morning upon waking. There’s a stomach ache that just shows up, it’s my body’s signal that all is not well down in my psyche…that as much as I want to be optimistic, I’m a bit freaked out.

Part of me wonders if I’ll post this blog…and another part whispers “it’s important that you do”. Others need to know that it’s ok to go through the emotions, it’s ok to get mad, or freak out a bit, it’s ok to feel like you need to get some deep breaths…just let it out. Let it out through tears, let it out through writing, go outside and look at the sky, hug a tree, do what you need to do to process the emotions and release them.

Release them with purpose, if you’re gonna cry, cry with an agenda…let it ALL out and go through every single fear and worry that you have, get it all out if you need to. Do this with the knowledge that once you’re done (and I promise…you will be done even if it feels like it’s gonna go on forever)…once you’re done, you’ll pull up your big girl pants and move forward.

You’ll want to freeze up and stay under the covers…and that’s ok for a little bit too, but you can’t stay there, it’s not healthy for you and it serves no one (I think I’m talking to me now…but maybe you too)

It is essential to know that you have to come back from your freak out, you simply must. Honestly, you won’t want to stay there. I promise, you’ll be better once you do it and you’ll feel lighter and with that, you will dig down and find the strength to continue. We need your strength and part of being strong is admitting when you need a break from it and allowing yourself to just coast for a while.

So go ahead, cry, hit a pillow, do the thing.

The world will keep moving and you’ll feel better when you’re done.

Trust me that the world is going to be ok, we’re going to be ok. Yes, we need you in the game AND it’s ok to take that break.

I truly believe that every moment brings us closer to a better world for all of us.

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